Revelation Of God’s Grace Brought Freedom From Pornography Addiction
I’ve been going to church since I was a kid but I didn’t understand how much God really loves me. I’d looked at God like He was a mean, angry old man who expected perfection out of me.
I’ve known about Pastor Prince for a few years because my mother watches Trinity Broadcasting Network. However, I didn’t really pay attention to his teachings until August 2011. At that time, I was in bondage to pornography.
I’m 21 this year and I became addicted to pornography when I was 14. I would watch it at least once a day. I would lock the door to my room so no one could know, but at the same time I was trying to lock God out of my situation. I knew it wasn’t right because I would always feel ashamed.
People say that they have a hard time hearing God, but I would actually hear God most clearly in my spirit right before I watched pornography. I would hear Him say, “This is not what I have planned for you.”
As God would have it, in August 2011, I watched two video sermons by Pastor Prince titled, Breaking Porn Addiction Through Grace and How Believers Fall From Grace on YouTube. Even though I’ve been saved for 16 years, I never knew what grace was until I watched these videos.
Whenever I sinned, I would always ask God to forgive me, then I would make the mistake of saying, “I won’t watch anymore,” or “I won’t give in to this sin anymore.” But because I was prideful and I trusted my flesh, I would fall back into my old habits within 24 hours! That was how deep I was in the quicksand—I kept trying by my own efforts to escape, instead of letting Him pick me up.
Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed...”
I needed to be set free but I couldn’t do it on my own. Wrong teaching in the past taught me that it’s all based on what I do, or don’t do. If salvation was based on my goodness, then why would God send Jesus? God sent Jesus because it isn’t based on my obedience or lack of it. It’s based on His obedience at the cross!
I had no idea that law was demand, and that grace was supply. Growing up, I was always sin-conscious, instead of being conscious of my righteousness in Christ. So when I saw Pastor Prince’s sermons, true repentance was taking place in my heart and mind.
I prayed a simple prayer saying, “By God’s grace, I will not watch, or give in to sexual sin anymore.” The difference is God’s grace! Who knew adding two words to my prayer made all the difference! And here I am to say that one year later, I haven’t watched pornography! By God's grace, this long-term bondage has been broken!
It’s so awesome how good God’s grace is. I believe that if I had not watched Pastor Prince’s videos, I would still be lost. I would still be under the law, and sin would still have dominion over me.
Praise God for the gospel of grace, which is revealing who Jesus is to me. The law reveals how bad I am, but grace reveals how awesome God is! Thank you very much, Pastor Prince, for being a light shining for Jesus! God bless you!
Texas, United States